URL vs. IRL beauty
internet burnout and reading on the subway
Last week 50% of the subway car was reading. I can confidently say it was 50% because I was in awe (and started counting). Full rows of humans enjoying their books, no blue light in sight. In place of empty stares scrolling, waiting for something to catch our attention there was a peace, a joy, a presence. Diving into unexpected words and worlds.
In a overly stimulated, overly consumed world of anti-this, fountain of youth hack, keeping up with the, and don’t worry we have filters for everything! I don’t know if I’ve paused and admired the unfiltered beauty that comes from stripping it all down. Cutting out the noise. There is a beauty that comes from peace and presence that we can’t hack our way into. If there is anything I aspire to be, it is that, often.
So, I kept observing people in their most beautiful form — reading.
The next day, I stepped back on the subway only to find an eerily similar situation: more books than phones? So, as to not be the odd woman out, I took out my current read A Little Life. Before I opened the book I heard “have you cried yet?” Admittedly, I was a little thrown as conversation on the subway is few and far between. I stumbled through my thoughts on what I’d read so far and that I was gearing up to cry any page now. She shared what she was reading (A Court of Thorns and Roses) and we retreated back into our respective words and worlds.
Had I been on my phone I wouldn’t have had my perfectly imperfect “proof of life” interaction. I likely would have been scowling into my phone, tuning out the happenings around me, and skipping from one internet emotion to the next — distancing myself from the very physical world and moments waiting to be met.
Last September, I went through a undeniable phase of internet burnout. My news consumption (across all platforms) was at an all time high — I felt the URL seeping heavily into my IRL. My mental state took a dip. I was exhausted. At an attempt to remedy, I decided all my commute and down time would be dedicated to reading. At the time it was Big Swiss, which fully immersed me.
Slowly, I noticed that the hours I recommitted to reading allowed me to invite peace and presence back in. Maybe we will start to strive for that type of beauty, and maybe all we need to start is a good book.
Lately, filling the cup —
A read from
I can’t stop thinking aboutSeen Library — an intentional community of readers by
(one of my favorite follows)Drinking water out of a fancy vessel at home to make staying hydrated feel more fun during the colder months
This!
"There is a beauty that comes from peace and presence that we can’t hack our way into. If there is anything I aspire to be, it is that, often."
Thank you for sharing seen library and my newsletter 🥹🤍 means a lot. Loved this piece.